Without You Things Go Hazy
by fostersjacob
Summary: She normally doesn't care much for Valentine's Day but this year, this year is different. [Sizzy one shot]


**AN: **So, I know it's late but I had a few problems with my laptop, ended up losing a bunch of documents but still here I am, three days late but still... Forgive me? :) Hopefully you enjoy it.

~ fostersjacob

* * *

Isabelle Lightwood has never really cared much for Valentine's Day, until this year that is. This year she has someone, someone that she loves very much and she doesn't care who knows it. She doesn't care that this is a cheesy mundane holiday, she cares that it matters to Simon and what matters to him also matters to her... Yes, even Star Wars.

Simon seems to love Valentine's Day, Isabelle isn't exactly sure why, perhaps it has something to do with his old life as a mundane, whatever it is doesn't matter. He matters. His happiness matters. He chose this, this life, she isn't going to ever let him regret it. They had agreed yesterday to keep things casual, no over the top craziness, just to be together and enjoy it. Though at first Isabelle wanted to go all out she agreed to keep their Valentine's Day plans low-key, whatever makes Simon happy makes her happy too.

_"Iz, no craziness for Valentine's right? Just you, me and love, love, love."_

_She can't help but smile. "Of course Lewis, of course."_

Her bedroom is just directly below Simon's at the institute and so when she hears him leave it at 7am and then not appear at her door she's rather disappointed. Maybe he has something planned, whatever it is she'll find out soon enough. Then she shuts her eyes and goes back to sleep. She'll see Simon later.

* * *

**Last year, Valentine's Day.**

"Ugh," Isabelle mumbles. "Stupid Valentine's day, stupid love, stupid stupid relationships stupid stupid stupid."

As she walks into the kitchen she soon wishes she hadn't. There sitting together at the table is Alec, Magnus, Jace and Clary. Corny Valentine's Day cards on the table, genuine happy smiles on the couples' faces, it's then Alec asks if she would like to join them. She doesn't know what it is about this that sets her off, she just can't help it, the mere sight of them right now angers her. Isabelle scoffs, as if she'd want to stay here. "I'd rather be on my own than subject myself to this nonsense."

Alec sighs, he shares a look with Jace who just nods at him. "Look Iz," he says softly as he places a hand on her shoulder. "We understand that you miss Simon and that today must be-"

"Stop." Isabelle snaps. She grabs his hand that is on her shoulder and takes it off of her quickly. "You understand do you, brother? Do you understand that my boyfriend gave up his immortality not only so we could return safely but so that your beloved Magnus could live and now I can't stand to be around you? Do you understand that Alec, do you?"

Alec's expression is unreadable but Isabelle knows that she has hurt him but in this moment she just simply doesn't care. It is then Clary gets up from the table, hopeful she can calm Isabelle down and help her. "Izzy, Alec is just worried about you... We're all worried about you."

Isabelle shakes her head fiercely. "I don't want your concern or your pity or any of it! I don't want it," she shouts. "I just need, I just want Simon, that's all. I don't need you or Alec or anyone telling me they're concerned for me. None of you get it, if it were Jace who had forgotten about you Clary, you would understand my pain then but he hasn't and he won't, so enjoy your shitty mundane holiday and leave me the fuck alone!"

Nobody says anything as Isabelle quickly makes her way out of the kitchen. No one knows what to say and so they stay silent.

* * *

He races through the door, nearly dropping the coffee in his hand as he makes his way down the corridor. Simon makes his way to Isabelle's room and isn't at all surprised when he finds her still asleep. He leaves the coffee on the table beside her bed, then he takes his rucksack off his back and opens it up so he can take out his Valentines card for her and leave it underneath the coffee, then he takes out the paper bag from the bakery that has a delicious fresh doughnut inside of it and places that next to the coffee. The slight movement from Simon in her room brings Isabelle out of her sleep, she yawns as she sits up, glad that the first thing she sees is her boyfriend. Simon has already closed up his rucksack and slung it back on. He sits on the side of Isabelle's bed. "Happy Valentine's Day Iz."

Isabelle smiles, this Valentine's is already a thousand times better than any other. "Happy Valentine's Day Simon."

Simon leans over so he can kiss her cheek and then he gets up, much to Isabelle's surprise, he isn't staying. "I have to go, I'll see you later?"

Isabelle frowns but she forces a smile. "Yes of course."

Then just like that Simon is gone and Isabelle is left alone in her room feeling somewhat disappointed. She instantly feels guilty for feeling that way when she sees what's on her bedside table, she's rather lucky to have someone like Simon.

Hours pass by and Isabelle is growing concerned, she hasn't seen Simon since those few minutes in her room this morning. As she wanders around the Institute trying to kill time until she hears from him she stumbles upon Clary, who strangely was on her own and not attached to Jace's lips. "No Jace?" Isabelle asks.

Clary shakes her head, _no_."No Simon?"

Isabelle sighs. "No. I haven't seen him since this morning and that was only for a few minutes."

Clary frowns. "That's weird," she tells her. "I've barely seen Jace all day either."

As if they knew they were being spoken about both Jace and Simon appeared. "Well, hello ladies."

Clary grabbed Jace's arm and lead him away, undoubtedly wanting to question him about his whereabouts given the fact that it is Valentine's Day and they should be spending it together. Isabelle, however, does not drag Simon away, instead she smiles politely and tells him that she has missed him today.

Simon smiles. "I've missed you too, Isabelle."

Isabelle notices something poking out from around the corner, like a case of some sort and Simon sees her looking at it, "It's mine."

"What?"

He grins. "That, over there, what you're looking at is a guitar case and inside it is my old guitar."

"Oh," Isabelle mumbles. She had been hoping that perhaps the reason he had been gone for so long today was because he was getting her a somewhat extravagant gift.

Simon knows that Isabelle is expecting a gift, he intends to deliver. "Do you want me to give you your presents? Now, I figured that I've put you through a lot and I missed last Valentine's and so, I may have gotten a little uh sentimental about it all."

Isabelle could feel tears forming, she is not exactly the most emotional girl in the world but something about Simon brings all these feelings to the surface. He overwhelms her, his love for her overwhelms her, sometimes she can't believe that she finally has a boyfriend who loves her but it does. She does.

Simon grabs the guitar case, carrying it up to his room and Isabelle follows. He insists that she sit on his bed and so she does. Now that she thinks about it, he sure does look rather nervous right now. "Iz, I-I um well, I love you I mean I have always, I've always loved you, even when I couldn't remember you, who you were and what you meant to me, I would dream of you and I felt like there was some sort of connection, even though I didn't know what it meant at the time. Words will never be enough to explain how sorry I am for what you've been through because of me but I can't regret it, I won't regret making sure you got back safe, I only regret that it caused you pain. Anyway, I uh I know you deserve all the greatest things the world has to offer and I know I don't have a lot to give, I mean I'm just plain old Simon Lewis who still wears Stars Wars underwear but I will give you all that I can, for the rest of my life, if you want it."

"Oh god Simon," Isabelle was at a loss for words. "I love you."

He grins, he looks like the cat who got the cream. "I love you too Isabelle. Now, I have a couple of gifts. I know they probably don't look like much but I just thought I had to give them to you."

Isabelle nods. Simon goes to retrieve something from his drawer, it's wrapped neatly despite being wrapped just by him, wrapping gifts never was his strong point. He hands it to Isabelle, sitting beside her so he can explain why he's given it to her. She looks confused, she's just holding a random comic book in her hands, she looks to Simon for an explanation. He smiles sadly. "I found it, ages ago, before I could remember everything again... It was at the old apartment, you see Max lent it to me before he, he just lent it to me and I never got the chance to return it and so I thought, maybe it was a bad idea I-"

She interrupts him. "Shut up Si," she does her best to hold back the tears that are threatening to spill. "I love it, it means a lot to me, thank you."

Simon takes his hand in hers and gives it a gentle squeeze, glad that he decided to give it to her. "Now, the next thing. I wasn't entirely sure whether you'd want it, but Clary insisted that it would be a romantic gift... Just, open it."

He hands her a rather large looking book, except, it's no ordinary book. She opens it. There are pictures and little cute notes and random objects, it's like a sort of collage book, there's things recent and things from before the memory loss and she's overwhelmed, in fact she wants to cry simply because she's just so happy right now. "It's beautiful, this is so sweet of you Simon, I don't know what to say."

Simon chuckles. "Keep that in mind when you hear me sing."

"What!?"

Simon smiles shyly. "I um, uh, I kinda maybe sorta wrote you like a song. I-I-I don't have to play it if you don't want me to I could just sh-"

"Play Lewis, play."

He gulps, now the nerves are back, but he still gets up to grab his guitar. Simon decides to sit a little bit further from Isabelle when goes to sit back on the edge of the bed, he doesn't want to accidentally whack her with his guitar, he's still a clutz after all this time.

Simon strums the guitar gently and he plays, oh he plays.

_I watched you sleeping_

_Quietly in my bed_

_You don't know this now_

_But there's some things that need to be said_

_And it's all that I can hear_

_It's more than I can bare_

_What if I fall and hurt myself?_

_Would you know how to fix me_

_What if I went and lost myself?_

_Would you know where to find me_

_If I forgot who I am_

_Would you please remind me oh?_

_Cause without you things go hazy_

_I watched you sleeping_

_Quietly in my bed_

_You don't know this now_

_But there's some things that need to be said_

_And it's all that I can hear_

_It's more than I can bare_

_What if I fall and hurt myself?_

_Would you know how to fix me_

_What if I went and lost myself?_

_Would you know where to find me_

_If I forgot who I am_

_Would you please remind me oh?_

_Cause without you things go hazy_

_What if I fall and hurt myself?_

_Would you know how to fix me_

_What if I went and lost myself?_

_Would you know where to find me_

_If I forgot who I am_

_Would you please remind me oh?_

_Cause without you things go hazy_

He stops playing, the song is over, there's a silence between himself and Isabelle. Simon gently places the guitar on the floor, waiting for Isabelle to say something. She is getting choked up, she opens her mouth to speak but it's as if a lump is forming in her throat, instead she moves over to get closer to him and then, well then she kisses him, kisses him with all the passion she can muster. "Now, it's time for your present." She mumbles. Simon sees her begin to undress and he knows he is a very very lucky man, a very lucky man indeed. "God, I love Valentine's Day."


End file.
